something special
(NICHOLAS appears at the top of the stairs. He spreads his arms and smiles wide to greet his guests, walking slowly down the stairs)
NICHOLAS Welcome!
COMPANY WELCOME!
NICHOLAS Welcome!
COMPANY WELCOME!
NICHOLAS Welcome!
COMPANY WELCOME!
NICHOLAS WELCOME! TONIGHT WE'RE SHOWING SOMETHING SPECIAL.
AN ENERGY IS BUZZING THROUGH THE GALLERY
WELCOME, MY FRIENDS, TONIGHT IS VERY SPECIAL.
SPECIAL AS I'M SURE YOU'LL AGREE!
HAVE SOME STRAWBERRIES, OR SPARKLING WINE.
COOKIES, CRACKERS, CHEESE.
THE CAVIAR WILL SIMPLY MAKE YOU SWOON.
THOSE GORGEOUS GRAPES ARE JUST DIVINE,
BUT WATCH OUT FOR THE SEEDS
YOU'LL FORGIVE ME OF COURSE
IF MY VOICE SOUNDS HOARSE,
BUT I'VE BEEN SHOUTING ALL AFTERNOON
ABOUT TONIGHT! TONIGHT YOU'RE IN FOR SOMETHING SPECIAL:
THE WORK OF MY ADOPTIVE BROTHER GREGORY.
POOR BOY'S BEEN SLAVING OVER SOMETHING SPECIAL,
SOMETHING THAT I KNOW YOU'LL WANT TO SEE.
GATHER 'ROUND AND WITNESS HISTORY.
WHY HE'S STILL OBSCURE'S A MYSTERY.
SO STEP RIGHT UP AND BUY ONE.
THE SHRIMP IS SCRUMPTIOUS, TRY ONE!
COMPANY THEY'RE SOMETHING VERY SPECIAL, INDEED.
PATRON 1 (approaching NICHOLAS) Nicholas, your adoptive brother's paintings are exquisite.
NICHOLAS What can I say? The cultivation of beauty runs in our family.
Do you doubt it? Take a look at me:
(The guests swirl around NICHOLAS as they sing.)
BOYS HE BUYS HIS SUITS AT NORDI'S.
GIRLS HIS SHIRTS HE BUYS AT SAK'S.
NICHOLAS THE SALESGIRLS THINK IT'S SPORTING
WHEN I SCRUTINIZE THEIR RACKS.
THEY'RE ALWAYS UP FOR WRANGLING
BEFORE GETTING IN THE SACK.
YES, THE BEST POSTURE FOR BARGAINING
IS LYING ON YOUR BACK.
GIRLS HE ALWAYS SHOWS UP TARDY
TO A FASHIONABLE PARTY,
BOYS SO AS TO SHOW THE HOSTESS
WHO IS BOSS.
NICHOLAS WHEN FINALLY I ARRIVE
THE DYING SHINDIG COMES ALIVE.
AND WHILE I ENTHRALL HER GUESTS
SHE GETS MORE AND MORE DISTRESSED,
'TIL THE HARPY LEAVES
THE PARTY TO ME
AND GOES OUT TO GET SAUCED.
BUT YOU SOMETIMES SEE
A PART OF ME
THAT'S GENTLE AND REFINED
A NIGHT OUT AT THE SYMPHONY
HELPS ME TO UNWIND.
I DEVOUR GREAT THICK NOVELS,
I DRINK UP HEADY PLAYS
OF COURSE I HAUNT THE GALLERIES,
AND NOT JUST ON FIRST THURSDAYS.
GIRLS ALL THE SPA GIRLS FIGHT FOR HIM
WHEN HE GOES IN FOR A RUB.
BOYS ALL THE BOUNCERS BOW TO HIM
WHEN HE PULLS UP TO THE CLUB.
NICHOLAS RISING FROM MY SILVER CAR, I'M QUITE A SIGHT TO SEE
…OH, BUT PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, MY FRIENDS
PLEASE, TAKE IT EASY, FRIENDS
PLEASE, THAT'S ENOUGH ABOUT ME!
YOU'RE HERE TONIGHT BECAUSE WE'RE SHOWING SOMETHING SPECIAL:
THE ATMOSPHERE IS FRAUGHT WITH ELECTRICITY
YOU LUCKY SOULS ARE IN FOR SOMETHING SPECIAL—
(Suddenly the scene moves in slow motion as PATRONS begin to drift off the stage. NICHOLAS wanders among them, protesting and motioning for them to stay..
Finally, NICHOLAS is alone onstage. Donwcast, he ascends the stairs.)
AH, YES TONIGHT, TONIGHT COULD HAVE BEEN SOMETHING SPECIAL
IF IT WEREN'T FOR MY ADOPTIVE BROTHER'S MEDIOCRITY
I COULD REALLY HAVE MADE THIS EVENING SOMETHING SPECIAL
AS IT IS IT'S ONLY A DREAM.
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